Guys...I have a serious problem with you

I only like you if you're either emotionally unavailable or (physically) distant. Like 500 miles away or more kind of distant.

I can not deal with emotionally available men near me. JUST CAN'T DO IT.

I'm pretty sure this could be cereal and I should probably work on it. But if a guy texts me like every day and tells me how much he cares about me and shit....I pretty much want to just throw up. Like sack up dude. Fo rlz.

The downside of this of course is that I can't get cuddles on the regular. Sure, I could lead them on and use them for cuddles when I need them. But that would be not very nice...and I try to be nice.

I'm not really sure what I'm saying.

Basically I love guys who either love me but are too far for me to do anything about, or like me well enough but could take it or leave it.

To say I have commitment issues would be an understatement.

You’re kidding yourself, if you don’t believe it

So updates.

Apparently you actually have to pay to move out of the dorms at OSU.

Sucks bro.

But luckily enough, I'm now in a single, and no longer afraid for my life.

I am however afraid for the life of my dog.

Harley.

Harley and I in my senior picture

I've had him for 7 years, ever since he was a puppy. For awhile he was really fat, which is probably what caused his current condition. He has diabetes. Pretty severe too, his body has been eating itself for the past several weeks, and we had no idea. We thought it was from the steroids we had to give him for his skin’s reaction to fleas. We thought he'd get over it eventually. And now, because of our stupid assumptions, we're going to have to put him down.

I'm like bawling my eyes out while I'm writing this, which is making it even harder to write.

I got him spring quarter of my 8th grade year. The first time I ever saw him was during practice at track. My parents had gotten him for me for getting honor roll or doing well in track, I can't remember. Anyway it was a complete surprise, and I absolutely loved him. He was so tiny. I named him Harley, after the motorcycle, so he'd be a bad ass, because my last couple of dogs had been wimps. However he turned out to be the total opposite of his name. He ended up being the most neurotic scare-dy cat ever. Kind of like Courage the Cowardly Dog. Minus the saving me from aliens part. :]

Me and Harley in matching emo clothes (his hoodie had a skull and cross bones on the back!).

He then went from a neurotic wuss, to a neurotic alpha-dog. When I bought Tanner the summer before my freshman year at college. My mother called him Colonel Fussbudget. He was such a dork!

 

And now we’re going to have to put him down. In less than a year  from when we had to put our other dog, Gigi, because of cancer.

It’s hard when a dog dies, but it’s so much harder to actually have to plan for it. I’ve been crying off and on since I found out on Saturday. I can’t even begin to think about how horrible it’ll be with out him, since I’ve had him so long.

Blahhh

So felt like ranting, but really didn't know who to rant to!

So here I am. Writing this...yeah.

On to the Rant!

So I'm a junior at Ohio State, transferred here my sophomore year, spent the year at home, made zero friends. So I decided to try the dorm life for my junior year.

First roommate: Obsessed with her boyfriend, had to have him live with us every weekend, and into the week sometimes. She moved out because I couldn't concentrate with him around while she was gone. It was just weird.

Second roommate: Really nice, but never there. So she moved out at the end of the quarter so she didn't waste her money, totally understandable.

Third roommate: Third times the charm right? WRONG. Living with her is like the bastard child of Paranormal Activity and The Roommate.

Started off creepily enough. Laughing in her sleep, saying my name from time to time. Creepy but doable. Then, now this is where the terror comes from, shit hits the fan.

Around 2am she screams, bolts upright, gets out of bed, walks to the window in between our beds. Rips the curtains open (practically tears it off the hooks), stares out the window, starts cussing. Walks back to the bed. Sits down on the edge, stares at me, starts cracking her neck while she's staring, then rolls back into bed. Starts humming, and then silence.

Absolutely positively terrifying.

So obviously I want to move out right?

Yeah cool, totally. Get the permission of the Housing chick. Everything's groovy. Nope. Girl I was going to move in with is like uhhh yeahh...no. I don't think I want you to move in.

Bitch.

You don't have a choice! It's a freaking dorm. It's not your room. Whore.

But even though I'd be able to move in with her anyway, she'd probably make my life a living hell. So that's out.

Now trying to find a new place to live.

Also I have the flu.

What a life.